Tag archive for "ojai life coach"

Spirituality & Transformation

How Being Soulfish Heals the Planet

1 Comment 03 March 2010

It was Christmas 2002, and I had escaped the cold, ice and shadow of Glenwood Springs and embarked upon a 10-day road trip through Florida, starting with a three day stay at the Naples Bath & Tennis Club, a tennis academy. It was a lifelong dream to attend tennis academy, in the top 10 of my “50 Things to Do Before I Die” list, and I was in my happy place.

I was so enjoying the warmth, the birds, the breeze, and the thousands of things that had gone right and conspired to get me to Naples, I was floating, just letting my beingness be, glowing, not even noticing the drills and the exertion and the sliding and sidestepping of our feet on the green clay. An older, dour and sweaty-faced man pulled me out of my reverie on a break between drills: “What are you smiling about?” he grumbled through clenched jaws. Without thinking I smiled back, “Because I’m happy.”

Later that same day, another man in our group, an elegantly attired, perfectly composed man in his late 60’s with a South African accent and smile lines around his eyes remarked, “You just have the best smile. I love the glow and way you are being. No matter what you do, live to keep that smile on your face.”

It was disorienting to receive two different comments on my beingness in one day when that aspect of us is so often overlooked. To hear it from two different older men was even stranger. There is this cone of silence in the masculine code that precludes giving unsolicited coaching or advice to other men. In olden times men thought that was emasculating, a sign of weakness. I wrote that sentence to see what olden times looks like. I don’t think I’ve ever written it before. Stay with me this gets better.

Because the South African was obviously successful and happy, energetically felt ageless, and could appreciate the moment and my state without apology or expectation, something inside me took notice. Deeply took notice. My belly and heart softened with a deep recognition and relief. I knew that he was talking about something deeper beyond hedonism, that he had a broader context and more intimate experience our fleeting and terminal condition called life than I did, and was touching this moment lightly, playfully, meeting me where I was.

He was talking about being soulfish.

Being “soulfish” is living in alignment with what deeply feeds and nourishes that inner smile. It is a life clear on “for the sake of what?” and a life of service without the strain of sacrifice or effort.

Being soulfish is in a way it is to become invisible, for the relationship to “you” falls away and an enlightened action leaves no trace.

Being soulfish is “being the baby you always was.” and living from your basic goodness, original innocence that is your unique expression. The soul would rather be loathed for what it is than loved for what its not.

It is what Jon Gordon, in the 10 Minute Energy Solution, was talking about when he wrote: “The most powerful way to live a more energetic, happy, rewarding, and meaningful life is to identify your strengths and use them to serve a cause greater than yourself.”

Living “soulfishly” creates its own microclimate and attractor patterns. It unites and allows one to love even when it is inconvenient because life lives and loves itself through you.

My role as a coach is to co-create conditions favorable to the flowering of your soulfishness. We do that together, energetically, emotionally, physically, and spiritually. Doing that, and being that, the planet heals one person at a time.

If you are ready for that, if you really get that there is no “out there” out there, you are ready to join me on a path of soulfishness.

Sending you a big smile,

Just for Fun

Why Ojai–One Year Later

1 Comment 16 January 2010

Downtown Ojai in Fall

Fall Maple and Victorian House In Ojai

If you missed my original missive describing the events surrounding my pre-emptive strike on a midlife crisis, you may want to click here to get oriented.

Or just read on to learn what 14 months in my spiritual vortex/washing machine here has shaken out.

My overarching intent in moving was to count on and not repeat myself–a full-time and expensive endeavor. Financing my faith, not my fear, and doubling down, I spent a third of my net worth on personal and professional development in 2009.

People are shaking the Etch-A-Sketch and having it shaken for them willingly and unwillingly all over the US now, alone and with families. I was fortunate to be able to do it somewhat on purpose and alone. By mid-year the reinvention experiment definitely got out of the laboratory, but by then I was relaxed enough that I could tell my new life was unfolding according to some larger plan.

The Ojai valley is healing, powerful tribal land. Wise, no nonsense grandmother medicine.  I feel it most in the sparkling, dazzling dark silence.  It’s rich and hazy..steeping in it too long might make me unfit for life anywhere else. I found myself wondering if “healing” might sometimes be a socially condoned substitute for “escaping” or “resisting” in the same way that “trying” is wanting approval for something that one has no intention of doing.

The energy of “The Nest” is slow but strong, and shook my creative tree in the best possible way last year. I was gone at least a week every month in 2009, spending almost 80 full days actively immersed in retreat, educational and workshop settings, including The Sedona Method, The Work, Awakening Coaching Training, Soul Purpose Institute, Transformational Leadership Council, University of Santa Monica, and silent meditation retreats with Adyashanti.

These are a few improbable but possible truths, breadcrumbs really, that I have followed down the rabbit hole during these quasi times.  I can’t say that I found myself so much as lost parts of the old me I don’t even miss.  Other parts came to life to take their place, and I am definitely not the same person I was even six months ago.

One of the side effects of living in the vortex is the certainty that you are missing something–including certainty.

Random Musings

I have realized that I am unabashedly aligned toward beauty. And the underdog. And nature. And silence.

Without frogs, stars and crickets you got nothin.

It is clear that no one really knows what they are doing and there is no such thing as a grownup.

Because it was so close to my way of seeing and being, it was a real ah-hah to realize I was building websites and making pictures as an act of healing—creating favorable conditions for someone to clarify and express their Essential Nature with light. I was basically doing energy healing with congealed energy in the form of pixels..it still surprises me, even now, to write it..

The deepest addiction is to I—but quitting it cold turkey—well, not for everyone. Two words. Park Bench.

Ojai is supposed to be the cult capital of California (possibly the world) but I haven’t been recruited, likely because I have now become too open minded and spiritually polyamorous to drink any one flavor of Kool-Aid.

I have eaten an incredible number of avocados, oranges, and coconut bars but my main staple is Nick and Rob’s Power Burrito.

If you are thinking of making the leap..know that you will never feel quite ready. Conditions are never favorable enough. Never. And there is no perfect place. But the good news is that the universe and everyone in it genuinely wants you to succeed, especially if you are authentically expressing your soul’s purpose And, grace often comes in the form of all the things that don’t happen..as my friend Steve D’Annunzio says, “Rejection is God’s protection.”

I see now how I imposed my own ceilings and limits based only on what I believe I can handle. It was completely made up and I see that now.

So is any moral or pattern or directional conclusion you may draw from any of this.

Until next time, safe journeys,


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